It’s like a warm summer day when you’re immersed in putting your finger in your butt hole and forcing others to smell your finger only to have this loveliness interrupted by gale force winds.
Hah! I am far from Your grasp, Wait, If I say his name, I will dissappear, so HAHHAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IN MOTHER RUSSIA, THE PERSON WHO’S NAME WE DO NOT SAY IS IMPRISONED FOR DISSAPPEARING THE TSAR/PRESIDENT
I JUST HAD A REDBULL MIXED WITH VODKA AND COFFEE! AAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111
IT’S CALLED A FLYING NARWHALRUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Looks like you two are No Strangers to Love.
Looks like you two Know the Rules, and So Do I!
Is a Full Commitment What you two are Thinking of?
I know you two enough that You Wouldn’t Get this From Any Other Guy.
I just wanna Tell You How you two are feeling.
Just Gotta Make you two understand eachother.
So here it is:
Dan, Ctrax is Never Gonna Give You Up.
Ctrax, Dan is Never Gonna Let You Down.
All I wanna do is tell lies and hurt you.
And if that doesn’t work I’ll keep on tryin’ til’ I run out of cake,
Afterall you can’t just cry over every mistake.
These forums are populated by quite possibly the lamest, most unfunny morons I have ever seen on the internet. That’s pretty bad when you think of the entire internet. I mean how big of a lose does one have to be to make the forums of a lame website like this their “hangout”?
I would just like to say that I don’t like things. I am important, everyone better listen to me and bend to my will, or else I will stop posting dumba$$ comments about how I don’t like things, and might possibly become an hero.
I see where you’re coming from. I’m such a cool emo-hipster, too, and I also hate things, even though I, myself, am doing these things, too. That would make me one of the “lose”rs I speak of. So very sad.
I like that term “vaguebooking”. But yes, this, along with its cousin “vaguejournaling” are so obnoxious – i’m glad people are actively getting called out on it.
I think that’s the dilemma of anti-vaguebookers, if you’re commenting on a cryptic message by calling the OP on it, his/her attention seeking was successful…
THIS IS MY FRIEND!! This is the first time I’ve ever seen a status on failbook that was a friend of mine. I actually liked the guys response, but he clearly posted this right after he wrote it. Amazing. Hilarious. Love it.
It’s like a warm summer day when you’re immersed in putting your finger in your butt hole and forcing others to smell your finger only to have this loveliness interrupted by gale force winds.
what is this I don’t even…
Um… No… Not at all.
You must be new…
He’s our little pet, we feed him so he stays around.
I pushed her away
I walked to the door
I fell to the floor
I got down on my knees
Then I looked at her and she at me
Well that’s the way that I want it to stay
And I always want it to be that way for my Lola
Lo-lo-lo-lo Lola
TAKE ME
Bertbad, so good to see you!
WTF “HipsterHimmler”?
Plz tell me how do you monitor new comming Fails..
lol
does someone else want to become a pile of waist like monkey nuts? don’t do it, idiot.
*waste
Obviously TheJesusMan was implying that Monkey face is fat.
THE FIEND
Monkey face is not fat! He is big boned! It’s glandular! All his relatives are like that…it’s genetic!
plus, an evil but attractive torture-nurse forces 13 jelly donuts down his throat every morning, as punishment for his past crimes.
*Friend
Ever heard about RSS feeds? Or you can “like” Failbook on Facebook, then you will get every new fail on your wall when it’s posted…
But sweaty butt hole smelling is one of the greatest past times :/
Duck Butter!!!
pastimes*
MF this may be your best one yet. Love it! LOLOLOL
So 4-5 years until you’re old enough to drive?
IN MY COUNTRY CITIZEN MAY DRIVE WHEN 85 YEARS OLD.
AVERAGE LIFE EXPECTANCY 34, SO NOT MUCH TRAFFIC JAM. IS GOOD.
YEAH.
Read it in the ‘Heavy’ accent. SANDVICH IZ DELISHUS.
Thank you, Dan. You’re awesome.
No babe, you’re awesome
Umm… (B/lol/B) ??
Way to go!
Monkey face is an artist.
*arseist
*ars
haha, monkey face should be nominated for the troll of the year award, or possibly the fingering other peoples buttholes award.
(ಠ_ಠ)
MONKEY FACE
Y U NO SMELL YOUR OWN FINGER
Maybe he died before finishing his sentence.
So.. did he died??
*nipples
He just thinks ellipses are neat.
Maybe candlejack wa
but candlejack can’t ju
You mentioned CandleJack you idio-
This may sound crazy but CandleJack and I once had se
Didn’t anyone tell you that having sea bass with Candlejack will make your di
Hah! I am far from Your grasp, Wait, If I say his name, I will dissappear, so HAHHAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IN MOTHER RUSSIA, THE PERSON WHO’S NAME WE DO NOT SAY IS IMPRISONED FOR DISSAPPEARING THE TSAR/PRESIDENT
^ lolwut?
I JUST HAD A REDBULL MIXED WITH VODKA AND COFFEE! AAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111
IT’S CALLED A FLYING NARWHALRUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
GOOD GOD MY HAND IS AWESOME!
a123nd no3333333334w I’mfm typin58g iwth nurmbers89543
You’re going to die… in 3. 2. 1.
Coming from a shizzle named tizzle.
that made my morning
When I see these kinds of updates, I comment to them in a way that implies embarrassing and horrible things.
That’s not what you said last night…
Seriously though, I do expect you to replace that plunger. And you also need to do something about the stain.
Looks like you two are No Strangers to Love.
Looks like you two Know the Rules, and So Do I!
Is a Full Commitment What you two are Thinking of?
I know you two enough that You Wouldn’t Get this From Any Other Guy.
I just wanna Tell You How you two are feeling.
Just Gotta Make you two understand eachother.
So here it is:
Dan, Ctrax is Never Gonna Give You Up.
Ctrax, Dan is Never Gonna Let You Down.
But GeniousIdiot will troll away, and hurt you!
GeniusIdiot makes me cry ; _ ;
I think I might say goodbye.
All I wanna do is tell lies and hurt you.
And if that doesn’t work I’ll keep on tryin’ til’ I run out of cake,
Afterall you can’t just cry over every mistake.
Kickin’ in the front seat
Sittin’ in the back seat
Gotta make my mind up
Which seat can I take?
It’s Friday, Friday
Pudding
There is no pudding here, only roasted goat ass.
That’s ’cause you were with ME last night… wtf?
It was a long night
Those midgets still haven’t called me back
So….. the baby isn’t mine?
I thought the title said “Vag”-booking (which piqued my interest.)
My idea of heaven is now a booking service.
Oh wait that’s prostitution.
Heaven is real and only costs 4.99. Somebody inform the pope!
It’s not heaven as long as there are no male prostitutes.
First one’s free sweetie
Yay! Let’s all go there!!
I bet, that’s what Dan will think…
Am I that predictable..?
…heh, I said ‘dic’.
Dan, this childish behaviour is ridiculous *giggles*
Childish? More like 18+…..
points to Jibble for freakin knowin how to spell piqued!
*SCALLIONS!
*CONTRAPTIONS*
MAGNETS*
*MORANS…er MORMONS
*Moron…nix the moran
*peeked
“Fail”-booking
Reminds me of one of my friends… I should cap one of his posts to send in here…
Dont. Just drink bleach instead.
BAHAHAHAHA! I don’t know why this made me laugh so much xD
+1
I better drink my own piss…
What’s with the cryptic “ass updates”? Does he SHA updates about his ass before posting?
Wonder what “Good things…” means.
Cryptic “ass updates,” eh?
Updates ass criptically
= Canadian for ‘Cryptic “ass updates”‘
Your kinda updates
Someone woke up on the wrong side of the period today
Looks like someone had an extra bowl of b*tch flakes today.
Sandwich.
somone wearing their ovaries inside out
rofl
LMAO! I hate when my friends do this. It’s like they’re trying to go all emo on me.
I’d like to go emo all over you!
lol
These forums are populated by quite possibly the lamest, most unfunny morons I have ever seen on the internet. That’s pretty bad when you think of the entire internet. I mean how big of a lose does one have to be to make the forums of a lame website like this their “hangout”?
If you don’t like it, don’t read the comments. Idiot boy.
These people crack me up. You, on the other hand, are a tw@t waffle
I would just like to say that I don’t like things. I am important, everyone better listen to me and bend to my will, or else I will stop posting dumba$$ comments about how I don’t like things, and might possibly become an hero.
See what I did there?
I see where you’re coming from. I’m such a cool emo-hipster, too, and I also hate things, even though I, myself, am doing these things, too. That would make me one of the “lose”rs I speak of. So very sad.
I like that term “vaguebooking”. But yes, this, along with its cousin “vaguejournaling” are so obnoxious – i’m glad people are actively getting called out on it.
Bad things…..
Why is she updating us on her cryptic ass anyway?
…come to those who wait.
Maybe the commenter should have paid heed to this. He haven’t, so the attention whore got the attention which s/he baited for…
Hurrah for someone getting called on VAGUEBOOKING. Love it!
I think that’s the dilemma of anti-vaguebookers, if you’re commenting on a cryptic message by calling the OP on it, his/her attention seeking was successful…
THIS IS MY FRIEND!! This is the first time I’ve ever seen a status on failbook that was a friend of mine. I actually liked the guys response, but he clearly posted this right after he wrote it. Amazing. Hilarious. Love it.