Submitted by: dunno source via Submission Page
-
-
-
Copy & paste this:
« Previous Gandhi Quotes Rule Facebook | For Me It’s Dreams About Bea Arthur Next »
« Previous Gandhi Quotes Rule Facebook | For Me It’s Dreams About Bea Arthur Next »
Submitted by: dunno source via Submission Page
I am not first
This is not a comment.
I am not replying.
These are not the trolls you’re looking for.
i will not put an end to the trolling
move along, move along
The pool is not closed.
1st
Staged.
seriously? who cares? it’s just meant to be funny, whether its real or not. stop reading them if you’re not going to get into it for the comedy.
Except it’s not really that funny.
First!
Then stop going to the site.
but the whole point of facebook ‘fails’ is that they are either pretty believable, or real. that’s what makes them amusing. anyone can make this shit up, that’s what original poster meant.
“Anyways” is NOT. A. WORD. That is all.
So HUBARMAFAGUS is not a word either, but I just wrote it
And it was fun!
Win.
That was awesome. Who does she think she is anyways?
Intentionally writing (or saying) a nonsense word just to be silly is not the same as being an illiterate moron. “Anyways” is one of my biggest people-who-don’t-know-how-to-talk pet peeves.
It is in the dictionary! Go look for yourself!
And being an uptight pedestal-propping grammar Nazi is the same as never getting laid
ILY XDDD
I’m a Grammar Nazi and get laid like whoa! My husband loves a good dangling participle, when I use who/whom properly, and he REALLY loves it when I bring a colon to the party.
Anal sex. You’re doin’ it wrong.
^WIN
da internets no is any place 4 grammar
And that’s one of the great things about English, it’s constantly evolving with each generation. People from a hundred years ago would be appalled by what we consider proper spelling and crammed today. BTW, you like how I started a sentence with “and?”
http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/anyways
“don’t-know-how-to-talk”? Can you still understand what they’re trying to convey?
Or do they say “anyways” and it messes with your head so hard you s**t yourself, then you stand there, motionless, with a scared and stupid look on your face?
GTFO… “don’t-know-how-to-talk”…
Anyways is considered nonstandard, but it IS a word. While we’re at it: ” “Anyways” is NOT.” is NOT a sentence. “A.” is NOT a sentence. “WORD.” is NOT a sentence. Anyways, there were about a thousand actual grammar mistakes in that post and you decided to gripe about that?
I hate to have to remind people all the time, but here goes: This is the internet. Specifically, this is “failbooking.” It’s called “The world wide web,” not “The world wide spelling, grammar, and vocabulary test.” Chill out (Oh, by the way, I am an English major with a 4.0 in English lit. so don’t fuck with me when it comes to things concerning the English language).
Hear, hear. “Anyway” wasn’t a word either a couple of hundred years back right?
Douchebag wasn’t a word one hundred years ago.
anyhoo?
and my two pennorth’s worth. there was like you know, this guy. errrrm. Shakespeare I think. wrote a ton of stuff. Anyhoo, he like wanted to express hisself, but found that somehow the words weren’t quite well… didn’t say what he wanted to say. So,he get this, he made them up. No lie. For real… no shitting. made up words for stuff all the time. Thousands of em. Got away with it too. Increased the vocabulary of the whole english language by about a third. one man. Hundreds of years ago.
so you know. Can happen. True story!
I’m holding out for Schvingpit, and Flarblegarble. dunno what they mean yet… but when you see em written down you know I coined em first.
anywhom
“I’m holding out for Schvingpit, and Flarblegarble. dunno what they mean yet… but when you see em written down you know I coined em first.”
I donno–I think Rose Nylund might’ve used them already.
Nice capital on that last sentence ‘English Major.’
…the period indicated that “lit” was an abbreviation, not the end of the sentence. Nice try though.
/not an english major
//still smarter than you
So it was a run on sentence? Don’t get me wrong, I’m all about the Grammar Gestapo, but, you know…
You didn’t capitalize the “S” in “So”. It was the beginning of a sentence, that means it should be capitalized!
You’re a douchey downer.anyways anyways anyways.
You’re probably one of those people everybody hates, but is perfectly content with always being right.
But anyways…
But ya, so anyways… that was pretty funny
Are you an idiot? Anyways *is* a word
Please see http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/anyways
You may notice that it is a word, with its own dictionary spot….
Thanks, though!
probably. lol
yeah, right? probably? I think he means he probably would have but now it’s slightly less likely….
Wow Thats harsh………….I wonder what they did.
facebook stalking, one presumes.
@Katie:
‘ “Anyways” is NOT.’, ‘A.’ and ‘WORD.’ are not sentences. That is all.
@Katie,
Anyways is too a word. It’s in the dictionary.
Main Entry: any·ways
Pronunciation: \-ˌwāz\
Function: adverb
Date: 13th century
1 a archaic : anywise b dialect : to any degree at all
2 chiefly dialect : anyhow, anyway
Whoa. 13th century! I was off by a few hundred years.
PWNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEDDDDDDD!!!!!!!!!!
#3…probably never…HA!
ha
being stalker’s victim is funny until you become one.
I didn’t know Tiger Woods had a Facebook page!
rotflol WINNNN did no one see this???
Geeeez… send a private message for something serious like that…
He has a terrifying phone number? Is she just not supposed to have the home number that’s terrifying? Oh…that’s not what he meant? He just doesn’t know how to separate two sentences with the use of punctuation? Oh ok. I get it.
Jackass.
maybe…the number is 666-666-6666.
just throwing it out there.
That’s more creepy than funny.
I KNOW I’ve seen this before, I’m just trying to figure out where…Maybe textsfromlastnight.com…
Makes you wonder why marriage is in quotes but she needs to change her name back (assuming that this is indeed directed at a female).
Because it’s not hard to change your name on facebook?
My guess is that these are teenagers who went out once or twice and the girl feels WAY more strongly about the guy than he does about her. Maybe they haven’t even gone out but she has a major crush on him. She’s head-over-heels in puppy-love for him and telling everyone that they’re married or getting married, and she’s changed her facebook name to his last name as if they were married. It’s totally something a young teenaged girl would do.
Crazy ones.
My guess? Stalker claims they’re married, and has also changed his/her name on FB.
How is this a fail? I have friends that post crap like this all the time directed at their other friends as jokes. I say: Not a fail.
It’s easy to get attention on facebook. This sudes probably still a virgin, and actually blew it with some girl.
Wonder what was in the message that made him freak out. They were in a “marriage” but never had sex; wait, that part sounds normal.
Ok, since so many people don’t understand this one:
Obviously, the girl he’s talking to is some sort of stalker/psycho/both who is obsessed with him and thinks they’ll get married.
I don’t know what exactly she said, but:
1) She got his phone number somehow and left a message on his answering machine.
2) She believes they will get married.
3) As a result of the previous crazy belief, she seems to have changed her last name on Facebook to his.
4) She said something about his genitals and probably said something that shows she thinks he wants to have sex with her or something…
That was so hard to understand.
Well thank Go…. er… the flying spaghetti monster for that. By the way this thread was running I was beginning to think I was the only one who looked at the snap and actually understood what was happening.
Ok, there are five things I need to comment about on this one:
1. Terrifying? Really? Based on your supposed ages, I think its an easy guess that one of your “friends” sold you out and thought it was funny.
2. I like how he describes it as a “f—ing family.” Makes you wonder what they would be so upset about #3 for…
3. “probably never” means he would have done you if he could have kept your craziness under wraps.
4. “marriage” to a girl that doesn’t even have permission to call him? Therapy.
5. Why tell her to stop commenting? If he isn’t blocking her already, means he must be waiting for this to blow over and give #3 a shot again.
That guy failed at personal information protection…..He as a freaking big mouth, for a guy who found his phone number…….or there was just some stupid guy who went on a phone number site and type the name for the phone…
HERE IS WHAT DEFINITELY HAPPENED:
A female is in love with the above boy, and she stalks him but he wants nothing to do with her. So,
1. He is shocked and scared to know how she found his home phone number because he probably only gave her his cell number.
2. She calls him and tried to leave a seductive message declaring her love for him but he lives with his family so they all heard it.
3. She wants to fuck him, and mentioned it on the voicemail, but he has ruled out the possibility of it ever happening.
4. The crazy stalker thinks they are going to get married, but this also is not going to happen.
5. She has changed her last name to his on facebook and keeps commenting on his photos because she is in love with him.
THE END, PEOPLE. IT WAS NOT THAT HARD TO UNDERSTAND.
My interpretation of the scenario (which makes sense with marriage being in quotes and him having no intention of having sex with her) is that it was one of those things where the girl is an immigrant who needs to get married to stay in the country, so she paid him to marry her for a few years until she gets a green card (or whatever.)
Oh please post more of this, i need to know more!!! What happened before and after!! I love this site, makes me realize that facebook is just an online social soap opera
Because just blocking the person would be soooooo much harder. Nice added drama.
So… she’s marrying him, but she’s pissed off that he got her phone number? Logic fail.
…Oh, right, I see. My apologies.
you can set your status as married on facebook w/o actually being married…
How did she get his phone number, um 411 Information? It is amazing that people forget that.
All you need to know is someone’s last name and city.
I lol’d
I l’dol
aw… “So this is how I was conceived!?”
Hmm, as a woman I’m sure you’ve never come across the crazy chick equation for guys, basically it goes;
crazy x desperate + hot = good in bed.
Obviously the equation also goes (- relationship) as a variable, since despite being sex kittens they also make horrible horrible girlfriends. As well as that added advantage there’s some guys who find drama a turn on. This particular guy probably thought it was terribly hot the first time said chick turned up to his apartment completely naked under a coat and crying.
There is however an uncanny valley for this, where if the “crazy” and “desperate” get high enough (the “hot” factor becoming somewhat moot as it’s number is insignificant in comparison, though some suggest that it actually acquires a strong negative rating at a certain crossover point), the graph inverts, nosediving away from “guaranteed good shag” and into the sub-zero depths of “please get the hell out of my residence, I’m not going to do anything to offend you because I think you might stab me and you’re a good mate of one of my other friends, but there’s no way our respective bits and bobs are coming together because then I’ll never be able to shake you for the rest of my life without one of us dying, and probably not of natural causes”
*deep breath*
phew. yeah. voice of not so much bitter, more still slightly frightened experience there.
See what you’re talking about there is variable (+ crazy incident) which flips the entire equation into a negative axis.
No matter how hot said crazy girl is there is always the one time you do realise that you might not survive this encounter. My personal experience was my ex (who was a violent, batshit lunatic of a girl) getting arrested for having an ‘argument’ with her sister. Well, so she explained, turns out she just beat the shit out of her for at least half an hour. The sister had two black eyes, a broken nose and needed a tooth fixed. My ex’s reaction? “Yeah well, I used to box so fuck her. She shouldn’t have pissed me off.”
seriously, if there was ever a marriage to be considered i have one issue with this post. If I’m goin gto marry someone, I will have their home phone number and it will not be a question that my fiance could ask.Both parties in this situation are seriously screwed up.
Marriage was in quotes. I’m assuming the chick changed her status to married, when they weren’t.
Silly teen drama.
wow, okay, so I can’t believe you haven’t figured this out yet:
The girl and guy obviously were “married” on facebook, probably just for fun, I’m guessing she requested it with an “lol”. They probably hung out a little, and she thought it was real and changed her name on facebook. They’re most likely in college, not living at home, so he only gave her his cell, not his parents number.
He went home for a weekend or break or something, and didn’t answer his cell or what ever, so she found his parents number and left a dirty message (hence #2). This freaked him out enough so he wanted no contact with crazy girl.
Ah yes, a message from Taylor Lautner to his fans.
Poor guy.
i figured they were engaged or something….
My favorite part is #3; specifically the “probably never” part.
It’s like he wanted to say never, but knew that it if the conditions were right…. yeah, he probably would’ve still hit it…